Terms and Conditions:

By either reading or ignoring this page, you acknowledge that shophydra is not responsible for any unfortunate events that may befall you while using our site. You also agree to not hold shophydra liable for any unpleasantness that may occur while using any product purchased from us.

All content on this site, including, but not limited to text, images, or code, is the intellectual property of shophydra. Except for the text, images, and code that we stole from other people.

In the event that a foolish, accident-prone individual makes a pricing error, shophydra reserves the right to refuse or cancel any orders for products listed at the incorrect price. Customers will be immediately refunded and the party responsible for listing the wrong price with be severely beaten with a designer handbag. (We’re only kidding, of course. We beat our employees with a belt like civilized human beings.)

Though we pride ourselves on maintaining a safe, unoppressive shopping environment, shophydra, and by extension, your usage of this site, is subject to ancient Babylonian law. Any breaching of the aforementioned terms and conditions will result in a just punishment, no lesser than limb amputation, and no greater than death.

Third-Party Sites
We’d like to claim that, throughout the vastness of the internets, all the best content is on our site. But that’s not true. In fact, recent studies show that shophydra has 72% less nudity than the leading paragons of quality internet content. Therefore, we may link to third-party sites in order to ensure that you, the loyal reader, are experiencing the best that the internet has to offer. These links are provided for your convenience, and you click them at your own risk. We have no control over the content shown on these sites, and as such, accept no responsibility for the aforementioned “quality internet content.”

As we strive to maintain an unbreakable level of trust between us and our customers, personal information collected by shophydra will never be released to other parties. You can rest easy knowing that we won’t sell your email address to advertisers. However, due to recent profitability breakthroughs in the Human Genome Project, we may license out your DNA structure for cloning experiments. (It’s a compliment. The world needs more wonderful individuals such as yourself.)